I lost the license plate lottery

I think I’m going to have to get these swapped out…

My folks hooked me up with a tiny-ass apartment on the city’s edge, and holy shit, I’m obsessed with my neighbors. Sometimes I’ll stomp out onto my balcony and just fucking scream, “I’m so goddamn sick of this crap!” and I swear, at least one or two voices will yell back, “Same here, dude!” 😂

#neighbors #apartmentlife #fml #relatable

I’ve got a wild crush on my college gym teacher—dude’s just 22, and I’m 18, so the vibe’s electric. Tracked him down on social media, slid into his DMs, and holy shit, this guy’s a straight-up pervert! He sent me a disappearing pic of his junk, and now I’m drowning in shame. Fuck, I can’t even deal with this mess… 😞

#crushinghard #shameful #wtf #collegecrush