I was gonna show off my Pathfinder: Kingmaker overworld talespire map =(

They told a ribbiting tale

It’s a canon monster I promise

Doable...

Whatever works...

ranged charisma (death) attack using thieves' tools

I am way prouder of this than I should be

Where there's a will there's a way. Be creative, DMs love it when you find creative solutions to circumvent their obstacles.

99 hp and a save ain't one...

150 years back pay. You never specified what currency he had to pay you in. Devils in the details, innit?

I'm gonna get sued for sure...