Weird thing

My girl dog has recently been leaking liquid and i checked her private part and she has this weird bump thing that looks like this?

What is this?

Seasonally my dog will start to get what I assumed was dry skin, just looking for confirmation that this skin / scabbing from being itchy?

Help, I’m at my wits end with pee incontinence.

My poodle mix is 10 years old, he has collapsed discs causing proprioception, and fecal incontinence (that’s not so bad). He also has aggression issues which have gotten worse, so we have to be careful with guests, and we can’t leave him with anyone! His pain seems totally managed with gabapentin and Carprofen and supplements. Except lately, sometimes he shivers. If it is pain, i will not drag things out, but he doesn’t cry, so I’m not sure it’s pain. The thing I can’t take any more is the pee incontenance. We take him out every couple hours, we limit his water, but still sometimes we pick him up to have him sit with us and good lord he pees everywhere. We tried diapers, but he can’t walk at all with them because of where they hit his back and legs. And even so, he’d be peeing in diapers every couple hours, which is a whole other set of problems. Mostly he lives in the linoleum floor kitchen, i even moved my office into the kitchen so we’d be together. We have soft beds in the kitchen and also on the couch and my bed, and they are covered with a towel (lots of laundry). It’s the couch and the bed… lifting him on or off, that’s when accidents happen, away from the towels. But it would be an awful life for him if he had to stay in the kitchen and couldn’t be with us. But our house smells like Natures Miracle (we buy it by the gallon) and I keep thinking I smell pee. He mostly sleeps, he likes to be outside and sit in the grass. He’ll play with toys once in a while. But I’m exhausted, and he ruined the couch, and we can’t go on vacation… is there a point where it’s too much? I’d especially like to hear from people with experience with pee incontinence.