Bonding: Fight over one-way grooming
What about it?
Hello! I adopted my helicopter-eared void male Plum 3 days ago for my female Winnie. Both are spayed/neutered. They hit it off right away and we’ve been bonding according to advice. The major issue is that Winnie groomed Plum immediately (basically once he was within licking distance) and he hasn’t groomed back and that has become a point of contention. It resulted in two fights yesterday. She presents her head and when he doesn’t groom her she starts following him around, nipping his bum, and then there’s a tornado. I separate immediately and give them a long break and they miss each other. We start again in the laundry basket and she grooms him and they cuddle and we progress to the bathroom and he still won’t groom back and it frustrates her.
Any advice? They want to be together but this power struggle isn’t helping. They can share a litter box, hay, a pile of veggies, love to snuggle, but this grooming is the final hurdle. Is this a dominance stand off?