I snatched the wallet from a drunk bastard passed out at the bus stop, reeking of cheap booze and regret. I tell myself, hell, he’d just blow it on more rotgut anyway—maybe some lethal hawthorn swill—and end up six feet under. So, am I a scumbag, or just a twisted kind of savior looking out for his sorry ass?
?—A damn hero in disguise
?—A total piece of trash
#thief #moraldilemma #streetlife #savage
Our granddad went and tied the knot with a damn vacuum cleaner!
The old man decked out his robotic bride in a frilly little dress and paraded her through town, dragging her by the cord like some bizarre trophy wife, until they finally locked his crazy ass up in the loony bin.
#wtf #crazygrandpa #vacuumlove #mentalbreakdown
Another wild, jaw-dropping tale from the depths of chaos. P18. So, I’m tangled up in passion with my girl, shrouded in darkness as the vibe demands. Suddenly, she slips away, vanishes, then reappears in the room. I dive back in, lips locked, hands hungry—until I notice her outfit’s completely different. I’m peeling off layers, exploring every damn inch, when bam—the light flicks on. Holy shit, it’s not her. It’s her sister, sent by their mom to grab something from the room. That’s how we ended on that screwed-up note. ?
#awkwardashell #wrongperson #epicfail #whatjusthappened
My girl and I get down and dirty with the 69 position now and then, but damn, we always end up bickering over who’s the 6 and who’s the 9 in this twisted game. Last time, the fight got so heated we nearly tore the house down, and I had to storm out just to cool off. Still, no matter the chaos, I’ll always claim my spot as the 9, reigning supreme!
#naughty #spicy #relationshipdrama #wildtimes