Screwed and Scrambled

D23. So, I started hooking up with this dude. Rocked up at his place, we chilled with a movie, scarfed down some sushi, and got down to business in the sheets. Come morning, he’s rushing out the door for some “errands,” flashing a grin and telling me to take my sweet time, sip some tea, make myself at home. Cool, I thought, I’ll linger a bit. Half an hour later, he storms back in, eyes wide like he’s seen a ghost, shocked I’m still sprawled on his couch. I throw him a flirty smile, and he just snaps, “I’m dead serious, get the fuck out already!”
Haven’t heard a damn word from him since...

#bootycall #ghosted #awkward #savage

So, I started dating this guy, and guess what—he’s never been with anyone before.

I’m not exactly a pro myself, to be honest, but damn, the thought of being his first got me all kinds of fired up. Here’s the hilarious twist: our first time, he couldn’t even figure out how to roll on a condom and ended up watching freaking YouTube tutorials right there in the heat of the moment. Second attempt? His soldier wouldn’t stand at attention... He straight-up told me he’s gonna order some Viagra and promised everything will be smooth sailing next time. Holy shit, what do I even do with this?

#firsttime #awkwardsex #viagra #wtf

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