D24. My sister’s got this gig at a marriage agency, and since I’m still a single chick, she’s been hounding me non-stop with her so-called “golden opportunities.” I finally caved the other day. She set me up on a date at this fancy-ass restaurant with a guy she swore was “the sweetest dude ever.” I show up, and who’s sitting there? A freaking grandpa. Dude’s 68. Flew all the way from New Zealand just for this blind date...

And hell, the old man’s loaded. Should I just say screw it, ditch everything, and run off with him?

😐-Screw this nonsense
👍-Ride off with grandpa

#blinddate #sugargrandpa #wtf #lifechoices

So, there’s this neighbor of mine, a real pain in the ass, who decided to play handyman and has been drilling into my sanity for a solid week. I couldn’t take it anymore, so I schemed a savage little prank. Got my girl to scribble a note in her girly handwriting and slapped it on his door: “GENA, I’M PREGNANT WITH YOUR BABY!” (Yeah, his name’s Gena, poor bastard).

The fallout? Absolute chaos! His wife tore into him like a rabid banshee for half the evening, screaming bloody murder. And now? Blissful silence for two whole days.

So, what’s the play here? Should I be the hero and confess to save this unlucky sod, or just let him stew in his domestic hell?

🤣 - Screw Gena, at least it’s quiet now!
👍 - Damn, save the poor guy’s skin!

#prankgonewild #neighborfromhell #savagehumor #domesticdrama

For my little bro’s birthday bash, we got some wild animators to hype up the party. The kids were screaming their lungs out, having the time of their damn lives. One of the animators, ballsy as hell, slapped a sack over his head and shouted, “Hey, kiddos, hit me, but don’t go too crazy!” Guess who ended up flat on his ass, knocked out cold from my surprise sucker punch?

#partyhard #knockout #savage #wtf